You ain't capable of nothing?...Personality Check - Part 2

Hmm…this is something I have always wanted to stick up the faces of those who think I am capable of nothing. I am not listing out my capabilities or skills that would run my CV into doldrums but trying to convey to those few and in the process learn to discover myself. I want to get on top of my voice and yell and cry. People, friends, relatives over the years have always seen me as a prick capable of nothing but blabbering. It was my manager Keith in Tulsa, who first made me realize how confident and a capable person I am. I take pride in saying that I worked in a kitchen that was managed by Keith and in a way opened my gates to real world of people trying to overpower their knowledge and experience on me. Though this aspect could be attributed to my undoing, it is very critical to hold me solely responsible.

The theory was that, capable men are by definition those who truly believe they can influence what happens to them, to their friends, to their future. Non-capable people by contrast are those who, whether students in school or staff at work come to believe “Its Luck if I make it or Fate if I don’t, but either way I had little or nothing to do with what happened.” I agree to a certain extent that luck has played a major part in my life and for me to be where I am it’s just been a dream coming true. But that said, I have 24yrs under my rear and I am shit capable to know something and capable of doing something and that too effectively, and people better realize that.

When I said my undoing, it is not because I know nothing but because I tend to be calm and cool in situations which usually demand a vocal contribution. The whole point is that, I do not want to get into an argument. Because, invariably a discussion on a topic or anything leads to an argument and I do not like it. Very recently in Vegas, we had an incident where out rental car was not starting and nobody was in a position to buy my argument that it was a “starter” problem more than anything else. Was it the adrenaline that made everybody put a cotton wrap in their ears or shut their eyes to see what I was trying to do? It was indeed a starter problem and we ended up leaving the car there and driving my friend’s car. And there too, I was not allowed to drive the car as they feared I was a careless and irresponsible driver. The result was that two of our friends had to spend the night at the Phoenix, AZ airport. I mean, am I that naïve to not understand the situations on hand, after all I have had the same exposure and experience, if not more.

What I call the below list are the significant points, I have made a list of perceptions of people around me and my skills that are the underpinnings of my capacity. What do I need to know, and what do I need to be able to do, to be a capable person.

The Perceptions of people around me are:

• I am not capable. I cannot face problems and challenges and gain strength and wisdom through experience.
• I am not significant. My life has no meaning and purposes – and what I have to offer is of value NO in the scheme of things.
• I have no influence. My actions and choices do not influence what happens.

The Skills are:

• How to respond to these feelings effectively – self-assessment, self-control, and self-discipline.
• How to communicate, cooperate, negotiate, empathize, resolve conflicts, and listen effectively when dealing with people.
• How to be responsible, adaptable, and flexible.
• How to set goals, make judgments and decisions based on ethical principles, wisdom and experience.

I feel these perceptions and skills should be nurtured, supported, and developed within me and for me, it makes the effing difference between a environment that excels, and one that simply exists. I have been practicing these and shall adhere to them for the term of my life. Thanks for reading.