Being Introvert is OK... Personality Check - Part 1

My readers have been screaming loud at me to write small. There are too many things attached to my life and those I would want to share but covering them all in a single post, I am sure to loose a couple more readers. Lolz. So here is one of those loose parts to my personality. I will have more of it coming in shorter posts like this.

Introvert was the word used to describe me in high school. That, and the boy with the freakishly skinny wrists. But then my entry into Bachelors had a deep impact in the way I approached life. Suddenly, my need for friends and fun outweighed the fear, and my life as a social butterfly began in full force. Thanks to my friends who are still my strength in many ways, I am what I am today.

That move was a turning point for me. I had lots of friends and I liked it that way. I wanted to be with people and always know what was going on. Still, I craved alone time but often skipped it for fear of missing out. As a result, whenever I took personality tests through family gatherings and fests, I was always pegged an extrovert. I was deeply rooted to my thought of being an extrovert, probably because I was given such care and comfort to work around. My stay in Tulsa, Oklahoma was a decisive chapter in the way things changed around me. I was loved, cared, and given freedom to do what ever I want, and the best part of it was how people loved me. They loved me for what I am and never wanted to see a different Phani from the time the Sun rose early morning. And that gave me confidence and the desire to function life in my way and that is how I saw myself, an extrovert.

Year later, now after I have a job and also so many friends to play with, I realize the truth: I am actually an introvert. People who know me in real life are sometimes surprised to hear that. I wouldn't call myself an extreme introvert, but I think I am returning to my kindergarten roots in a way. I'm no longer shy with people, but my energy is found only after time alone. The pressures of work & job search smoked the introvert right out of me.

Lately I've been thinking about education and personality. Sometimes it feels like I will explode from the inside if I don't have the opportunity to just be alone without the chatter. I need time to do important introverty things like stare out the window, sit for no reason, or write bad first drafts without an agenda.

But being occupied with so many things does not allow for such luxuries a lot of the time. Instead, I improvise. I find little ways and crazy times to squeeze in the quiet.

Director M. Night Shyamalan [The Sixth Sense; Signs], who was born in India, raised as a Hindu but whose parents sent him to Catholic school for discipline, admits he was a sensitive kid like his young protagonists.

"I was an overly sensitive kid for sure," he says, "and definitely shy. But with my friends I definitely wasn't shy. I was the smallest guy. I was the one leading everyone around. That kind of evolved into making movies where.. I get paid to boss everybody around."

How does your personality affect your work? What are some things you have discovered to help you maintain the balance between being who you are and being who those loved ones need you to be?...these questions always swirl in my mind and are cluttered as heavy as hell!!!.